Apocalypse Etiquette
“how among neighbours was scarce found any that shewed
fellow-feeling for another, how kinsfolk held aloof, and never met, or but
rarely; enough that this sore affliction entered so deep into the minds of
men and women, that in the horror thereof brother was forsaken by brother,
nephew by uncle, brother by sister, and oftentimes husband by wife; nay,
what is more, and scarcely to be believed, fathers and mothers were found to
abandon their own children, untended, unvisited, to their fate, as if they
had been strangers. Wherefore the sick of both sexes, whose number could not
be estimated, were left without resource but in the charity of friends (and
few such there were), or the interest of servants, who were hardly to be had
at high rates and on unseemly terms, and being, moreover, one and all men
and women of gross understanding, and for the most part unused to such
offices, concerned themselves no farther than to supply the immediate and
expressed wants of the sick, and to watch them die; in which service they
themselves not seldom perished with their gains”
- 14th century author Giovani Boccaccio’s who lived through the plague of the 1340’s
This is a surreal time. The movie plots we watch have escaped and found their way in our every day life. Supply shortages, a pandemic, death, mistrust, greed, poverty, and the overwhelming question of when will this end.
Everyone has a theory, nobody really knows, and thats the scary part. This could be 18 months or done in a month.
The timing is something we can’t control (outside of social isolation which all of you fucking assholes better be doing, the sooner you stop the sooner we can start again) I digress.
Whats interesting is to look back into history and see how other people have handled times like this. As bad as this is, it has nothing on the black plague. Anywhere from 30-90% of the population dead depending on where you live. So many bodies that they buried them in hastily dug trenches, and you couldn’t walk past a church yard because of the smell.
Something worth noting is that even though this was 700 years ago, there are weird overtones and similarities in the narrative and the conclusions people have drawn.
People believed the plague came from the east, people believe it was a curse from god (I don’t think anyone thinks that about what we’re going through but I’ve seen a couple comments about how this is from mother nature etc..), every matter of wives tale and false cure and amulet and miracle worker.
But its the uncertainty, the one thing we all share and the one thing we can’t avoid.
In times like this, the real enemy we all face is the one we live with every day. Our own cruelty and selfishness. I think humanity as a whole is kinda dumb. We make decisions that are against our best interests all the live long day. And its never more obvious than in times like this.
But now is a time to turn over a new leaf. To treat yourself, the people around you, and the world with kindness and humility and to have something to look back on and be proud of one day.
Here is my list of apocalypse etiquitte, or, how not to be a prick when everyone you know is terrified.
Now is not the time to pick a fight with people in your life - holy shit. We all have sore points in relationships with people we love, but for all we know we could be headed towards a depression, its not the time to settle some old score. Circle the wagons.
Recognize that most people have an electrical current of anxiety running through them so be more gentle than you have to be.
Reach out to people- not physically of course. But check on people. send text messages. settle petty squabbles.
Do whatever it takes to keep making money- so much of the anxiety and stress related to this is based on peoples fear around the economy. And rightfully so, me too. But at the end of the day this is not the time to live off savings or debt. Go get a job, any job. Humble yourself. I lived through a recession in europe when it was extremely difficult to find work. I was trying at the time to become a garbage man. But the economy being bad forced everyone in skilled labor jobs to take a step down and so even being a garbage man was out of reach. You may have to do something that is humbling. But be a delivery person, rake leaves, baby sit, sell pics of your feet or titties online, whatever. If you feel more secure your relationships are probably going to be much easier to navigate.
Keep an eye out for the vulnerable- in my experience, people have one type of charity they support and are almost blind to others. For example, there is quite an uproar about servers and bartenders losing their job and there should be, shit is scary and you should support those people. But I have seen 0.0 posts about the cleaning staff of hotels, people working entry level jobs in tourism that are now fucked etc.. my point is to expand the scope of your empathy. Everyone is going to need a little help before this is all said and done.
If you can, cover some ground towards your goals- long time readers of the blog know that I grieve forward. I try to honor the losses in my life with gains. You don’t have to become a master of the violin in your seclusion, but you can take this time as an opportunity to become a different you that you like a little bit more.
This shit is wild, and the only thing I know for sure is that we are going to need each other. I love you all.